I was inspired to write some positive things about the joy in my life and the thanks I have to give. Here are some of my thoughts for people and things that bring me joy and for which I am thankful...
Updated July 31, 2010
PEOPLE
My partner, BikerBeef, who makes life interesting, fun, and worth living. For sharing his affection, generosity, intelligence, wit, charm, smiles, fun, cute butt, but most of all, for his deep and abiding love. I try each day to return it, because love is something you always get back the more you give it away. I love 'ya, BB!
My parents -- my Dad, a diplomat's diplomat, language tutor, unsuccessful fisherman, and patient man. I regret losing him when I was only 12. My Mom, bless her, raised us well, cared deeply and lovingly, and was always open-minded. She learned to love me with all my faults and weaknesses, engaged her inquisitive nature to learn what it's like to have a Gay son, and also grew to love my partner. It was a difficult adjustment for her, but I am deeply thankful she patiently asked questions, did her research, and searched her soul to expand her love.
My family -- a huge, wonderful bunch who raised me right -- all 7 brothers, 7 sisters, Mom, Dad, Nummie, Nona, as well as 23 aunts and uncles... and more.
My extended family -- my father came from a big family too, so my aunts, uncles, and cousins have also played a large role in my life. I sincerely appreciate all the time and attention my Uncle Joe gave to me (and to my sibs) after my Dad died... I probably wouldn't have learned to swim, see movies and circuses, or see the fireworks on the mall in DC on the Fourth of July if it weren't for him!
I am also especially grateful to my Uncle Charlie for teaching me how to live in the winter of life and grow closer with a nephew he didn't get to know as well when younger -- all the way until his death at age 95, demonstrating what it's like to die with dignity and honor. I was saddened but deeply moved in being there for his last breath on this earth, at home in comfortable surroundings, with his loving wife of 64 years nearby. This is how I want to go when my time comes.
My life-long friends -- having been born and raised in the same town where I have lived my entire life, I have planted deep roots. Robert, Richard, Chris, Ellen, John, Paul, Paula, Mike, Laura, Roberta, Skip (others) -- you mean more to me than you may know. Let's go Christmas caroling in our old neighborhood until we croak (well, we croak already!); let's celebrate Fourth-of-July crab feasts and New Year's Eve together until Mike finally fixes his basement ceiling! (Like, um, never?)
My Okie connections -- my Mom's family hails from rural Southeastern Oklahoma, where I spent months each year of my young life growing up, learning to ride and care for horses, and first learning of my interest in cowboy boots. And my very close friend, Billie, who is very special.
My mentors -- some people who have taught me a lot and stuck by me through thick and thin -- Maude, Sylvia, Helen, Peggy -- thanks so much!
My BootBuds -- becoming active on-line through HotBoots.com has introduced me to a world of very caring, thoughtful, intelligent, and quite interesting guys -- Larry, Jeff (my 8th brother), Clay (my evil twin), KC, David, Paul, KJ, Greg, Mike, Derrell, Aaron (and more) -- your friendship and fun, kindness and support, great pics, smiles, leathered and booted bods, wow, what you have shared pales in comparison with what I would like to return. And I gotta mention my buddy Mike of Stompers Boots in San Francisco, who keeps me very well booted, indeed!
COMMUNITY
My immediate neighbors -- who have supported me to serve as their elected Homeowners Association (HOA) President for longer than I should hold the office, and for demonstrating that living in a highly diverse neighborhood is a real plus -- religion, age, sex, marital status, ethnicity, race, sexual orientation, etc. -- doesn't matter and we learn a lot from each other.
Neighbors in my greater suburban Maryland sprawl -- whom I serve in various ways. Reviewing testimony, supporting me in advocacy issues, and banding together to help our area remain a decent and quality place to live, work, raise a family, and be able to drive anywhere through the congested traffic.
Residents of a nearby large retirement community -- my friends, neighbors, and fun folks. You've taught me Bocce while practicing Italian; you've taught me how to help you live comfortably in your home, and you have shared Thanksgivings with us in good cheer and with lots of fun and love.
Elected officials in my county -- they do truly care about the quality of life we face and in planning for the future. While we may not agree on every issue, I can say that they listen. I have had the pleasure and/or pain of testifying before them, written tons of letters and email, and for the most part, I receive a response that is deeper than a perfunctory acknowledgment (all except for Ms. F., and she knows how I feel about that.)
One special elected official who welcomed me into her re-election campaign to serve as her webmaster, confidant, and friend. Goodness knows how often I have communicated with her about community issues and concerns during her five terms of office. I have never met an elected official who worked harder, listened more intently, or watched the county's tax dollars so closely. I am honored to have worked with her for 29 years, though I am very sad that she died unexpectedly in February, 2008.
MY LIFE
General good health, despite not having the best diet, exercise routine, and some unhealthful habits.
No chronic ailments or diseases -- other than aging and absent-mindedness. (I was blond before I went grey).
Financial security -- no debt other than a small mortgage. I always pay my bills in full each month -- thanks to Mom and others who have taught me how to manage finances, save for a rainy day (like leaving your employer and having enough saved to keep the bills paid while caring for your uncle for a year), and spend on what's important.
My former employer of 20 years -- for the most part, I appreciate having worked there. I got to travel to every state and territory in the U.S. and to several other countries. I learned my profession. I made many contacts -- most of whom dropped me like a rock when I left -- so that taught me, too, not to consider people you meet through work as friends, because unfortunately 97% of them really aren't. It was time to leave when I did -- and gave me time to care for my uncle (mentioned above), and return to being a caring, thoughtful, and much less-stressed guy.
My interim consulting contract providers -- who helped tide me over with very interesting projects where I expanded my skills and knowledge during transition between full-time employers. They gave me flexibility I needed and helped confirm that I had some value on this earth as a skilled professional when I needed it most (after mistreatment by my former employer.)
My education -- high-quality public and higher education locally and in Europe taught me a lot and I am richer for it.
Gifts and talents -- love of learning languages, fondness for math and numbers, music appreciation, attention to detail, carpentry and electrician capabilities, and typing faster than I can think, among other skills.
Travel -- having visited 56 countries beyond my own (United States), I value the richness the world has to offer, wonderful sights to see, things to do, people to meet. I'm not rich enough to visit everywhere I want to go, or go back, but loved every minute of everywhere I have been!
Our home -- despite going gray while building it, I love our house, its beautiful wooded landscape, my chef's kitchen, and our basement rec room, complete with a great workshop, huge bath, storage, extra pantry, boot closet, and media center. We plan to be in this house until we can't crawl up and down stairs any more.
Not having to cowtow to the latest gizmo or gadget. Anybody want a cell phone? I hate making rich companies richer, but you can't find a pay phone any more.
LOVE, FRIENDSHIP, COMPASSION, CARING, AND KINDNESS
I still optimistically think that civility remains a human trait that should be demonstrated by all for everyone. I try to extend that in each act I do every day.
If I have left something out, didn't mention your name, or you have some thoughts or ideas to add here, write to me.